Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Voices in My Head
And before you get too worried about that title, let me explain.
One of the benefits of having children later than many of your friends is that you get to hear others' advice, thoughts and methods. Then you get to sift through them and decide which to keep and which to throw out.
My problem, however, is that whenever I come upon a tricky situation (like a little boy who wakes up in the middle of the night randomly when I am not used to this at all since he started sleeping 10 hours a night at 6 weeks) I suddenly am assuaged by all these "voices" saying I should do "this" or "that". Not real voices, of course, but just what I think others would say "should" be done. You know, that parenting book says do "this" or that person would do "this" certain thing. It's quite annoying actually, and not helpful.
So I've found that I have to make sure to follow some of the best parenting advice I read since becoming a parent.
Be quiet, pray, listen to your intuition and go with that. Not follow something some one else said to do in a certain situation, but try to be focused on what the need is at the moment and what the true solution is. Not just what some "expert" says.
That advice has been encouraging and helpful. And peaceful. I should say that I do like to hear what the "experts" recommend and I don't necessarily think they're always wrong (at least, not the ones I agree with), but I find that I need to make sure I don't let myself get mentally bombarded with what everyone else says - or what I think they say.
So I was thinking about all of this after Edwin woke up crying twice last night. I think I finally figured out the problem (and it may have originated with that orange slice he had at lunch...) and helped him feel better.
Nothing about parenting so far makes me feel more inadequate than when Edwin wakes up randomly at night and I have little to no idea why. So I try to take that advice to stop, pray, listen and then act.